What do a cigarette and a hamster have in common? they are both completely harmless until you stick one in your mouth and light it on fire!
Sherlock Holmes and Watson are strolling through London when, out of nowhere, a cat leaps onto Watson and pees on him. "Oh, bloody hell!" Watson exclaims. â"My coat is ruined!" "You'll have to take it up with the owner," Sherlock replies calmly. "But I haven't the slightest idea who the owner is!" "Elementary, my dear Watson. You are both pissed on and pissed off at the same time, so it must be Schrodinger's cat."